Pray Like a Child

Tinsley, our almost-five-year-old, has become the resident meal pray-er.  I think it's mostly because she's so darn cute and fun to listen to.  We've gone through our fair share of "interesting prayers," and it becomes a great springboard for conversation afterward.

Recently, she has been in a rut.  And it is an odd little prayer.  There is some (minor) variance to the wording and word placement, but this is the general form:

"Dear God, I pray we have a super-great day.  I pray we never give up and never get down.  In Jesus' name we pray.  Amen."

Now, before you label me as a terrible father and a worse theologian, I want you to know that we have no idea where she got this prayer.  We tend to blame one or more of her teachers at school, but that's only because we can't imagine where else she could have gotten it.  And, of course, she's not telling.

Of the prayers she's prayed since the days of mimicking her older sisters, this one has had the longest shelf-life by far -- especially the "super-great day" part.

I'm not sure what response we are supposed to have to "public prayer," but I'm pretty sure that one of the responses we should have to any corporate prayer is that of reflection.  So, after hearing the prayer a couple (hundred) times, I stopped to reflect on what T was saying.  About that time, Wendy said to me, "You know what?  It's actually a pretty good prayer."  To which I responded, "That's what I've been thinking."  As soon as I realized my wife and I agreed on something, I knew we had discovered deep, deep truth.

Now, before we get into what the prayer is, let's chat for a brief minute about what it is not.  It is certainly not a long prayer.  For some, that is a negative.  For others, that is a huge positive -- especially when said with a warm dinner just beneath the nose.  It is not an outwardly-focused prayer.  No sicknesses or veiled gossip or lost people mentioned at all.  It is also not a global prayer.  There is no mention of kids who will have nothing to eat that day -- either in Lubbock or in Africa.  It is not a deep prayer.  (But it's also prayed by a 4-year-old, with no coaching from her parents and older siblings.)

It IS a horribly self-centered prayer, I will grant you that.  Outside of the most popular duo of the Trinity, the only people it mentions is, well, us.  But if we were to analyze our own prayers, aren't they mostly self-oriented as well?  Prayers for sick people are prayers for sick people who are OUR friends, or at least friends of our friends.  Prayers for people making poor life decisions are prayers of manipulation to get them to see our version of right and wrong.  And if we were brutally honest with one another, most of our time in prayer is asking for things we want for our own sake.

So, if we're praying selfish prayers anyway, why not make it sound something like the T prayer? 

Think about what T's asking for in this prayer.  She is praying that her family (the "we" of the prayer) has a super-great day.  What a beautiful sentiment!  And I don't know about you, but when I DO have one of those rare super-great days, I want to have another one as soon as possible!  And if we draw that out, super-great days cluster into super-great weeks, which make up super-great years, and before we know it, we've lived a super-great life.  Who among us wouldn't love for people to say about us that we lived a super-great life?!

She's also praying that we never give up.  Prayers for perseverance pepper the Psalms.  ("Strengthen me according to your word." - Psalm 119:28; "Deliver me from my enemies, O God; be my fortress against those who are attacking me." - Psalm 59:1).  Perseverance doesn't negate the reality of difficulty, but it causes us to overcome.  Every four years at the Olympics the networks go to great lengths to highlight those athletes who have overcome some sort of adversity.  Perseverance is one of those qualities that we all want to have.

Finally, she prays that we never get down.  Whereas perseverance is more of a physical thing, this is a prayer for mental and emotional victory.  One of our greatest enemies is our own broken psyche.  We talk ourselves into defeat much more often than we actually get defeated.  We talk ourselves out of great victories before we ever get started.  We mistreat people around us because we are down -- on ourselves, on our friends, on our families, on our country.  Staying positive is one of the most important aspects of a life well-lived.  No one wants to be around the "woe is me" person.  Everybody wants to be around the person who exudes positivity.

We could easily use bigger words and more words to make this prayer sound more like we're used to hearing prayers sound.  But isn't one of the purposes of prayer to bring our heart's desires before our Creator and actually expect Him to do something about it?  Let me tell you something.  Tinsley has probably had more super-great days in her last two years than I've had in 37.  She also is one of the most positive, creative, and self-confident little humans I have ever met.  Now I admit, it could be because she's 4 years old.

Or it could be because God is hearing and answering her simple prayer.

My prayer for you -- May the God of the universe grant you a super-great day.  May you never give up.  May you never get down.  In Jesus' powerful name I pray this for you.  Amen.

A Place at the Table, day 4

I have found that when I have been fasting for a couple of days, my body gets settled and I become almost impervious to the fact that I am doing something different with my diet.  That settling happened on day 4.  It was Saturday, so I had an easy morning and then had responsibilities refereeing a basketball game and then coaching Faith's basketball team (we won, but more on that in a moment).  The afternoon was naps and TV, dinner and baths for my girls.  A relatively serene day on the Lent front.

So I want to just take a moment to write about my experience coaching Faith's Upward basketball team.  This was my first experience as a head coach, so I was very nervous going in.  Despite the fact that I played competitive basketball through college, I had never coached before.  And in case you didn't know it, girls basketball is a little bit different from boys basketball.  But Faith & I had an agreement, so we went with it.

My goal in coaching these eight girls was that they would develop a love for the game and that they would continue playing basketball well beyond this year.  And I wanted basketball to be fun.  About halfway through our 8-game season, I looked up and we were undefeated (with a tie).  That became a bit of our guiding principle from then on.  But I still tried to keep them focused on skill development and a love for basketball.

Our last game was yesterday.  Faith had yet to score this season, and while I was excited about our team's success, I SOOOOOO wanted Faith to score.  At least once.  She came out in the game yesterday very aggressive, getting several steals, a few rebounds, and even a jump ball.  She got off a couple of shots, but nothing fell.  Until.  She got a rebound and arched a shot really high, and it came down right where it needed to -- nothing but net!  I am by nature an "energetic coach" (shocking, I know), but I about jumped out of the gym.  I was so happy for her!  She had worked so hard and kept going despite her inability to score points, and it was rewarded in that last game.  And because I was the coach, I was guaranteed the opportunity to see it.  We did end up undefeated, but that paled in comparison to the joy I saw on Faith's face!

I hate that I'm beginning to sound like somewhat of a broken record in these posts -- I guess that's what happens when your diet looks the same every day -- but it really is the simpler things in life that grant us the greatest joy.  I've had success in life and school and ministry.  But my girls don't care about any of that.  I decided long ago that whatever opportunities I have to be in my daughters' lives, I'm going to embrace them.  That's why, when I get to take Grace & Faith to school in the morning, I park my car and I walk them into their classrooms.  When I take Tinsley to school, I chat with her teachers and give her a kiss before I go.  Especially with my oldest, I'm not sure how many more days it will be before walking down the school hallway holding daddy's hand will be socially unacceptable.  But I'm gonna get the most out of it while I still can.

So, if you're a parent, enjoy every moment with your kids.  Hug them tight.  Kiss them goodnight.  Walk them to class.  Carry them when they ask.  Volunteer at their schools.  Coach their sports teams.  And if you're a grandparent, be in your kids and grandkids lives.  Go to their softball games as often as you can.  Give your kids a break by taking your grandkids for a day.  Bosses will fire you.  Jobs will change.  Stock markets will take your money.  But you'll always have your kids.  And you'll never forget days like yesterday, when the shot hit nothing but net.